Introduction

Starting in my childhood, I spent many years in psychotherapy. Throughout my 20’s, I was involved in a 12-step fellowship. As an adult, I spent close to a decade on SSRI medication. All of these have, in their times and with varying efficacy, buoyed me through the choppy seas of chronic depression, anxiety, low self esteem, and substance abuse. None fundamentally improved my experience of being human. They kept me functioning.

Last February, after a few years of playing around and becoming very familiar with them, I had an experience on 5.5 grams of psilocybin mushrooms that changed something at my core. Somewhere in the boundless darkness a light switched on. Something healed. For the first time in a long time, I didn’t feel disconnected from myself or the world. It was like therapy and religion jumped up and high-fived inside my head. I’ve been talking about it to anyone who’ll listen ever since.

My intent here is to catalog and report on every full-dose psychedelic experience I have ever had. To the extent that is possible, I will include all pertinent and available data for each of these experiences: date, age, body weight, substances consumed and their doses, setting, timeline of effects, mindset going in to experience, activities engaged in, and companions.

A number of these experiences happened between the years of 1989 and 1991. My memories of these experiences are incomplete at best.

Since 2015, I’ve had a growing number of new experiences. My memories of these are, obviously, much fresher.

While being objective about tripping my face off is impossible, I’m taking as much care as I can to not embellish, exaggerate, or fictionalize these reports, including my own feelings. Particularly for the older experiences, I ask myself, “Did I really think/hear/see that? Was this really as funny/meaningful/dramatic as I’m saying it was?” I feel like the psychedelic space is the closest thing to sacred that I’ve experienced and I want to be respectful to it.

I don’t mean to be overly serious though. Psychedelics may have had a big therapeutic impact on my life but they’re also really fun. I like hearing trip stories. I hope you enjoy mine.

  

Thanks for reading. Travel safely.

Disclaimer: Most psychedelics are illegal to cultivate, synthesize, sell, buy, and/or use in most places around the world. I might think that’s absurd but here we are. In no way with this blog am I suggesting that you do any of those things.